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I'm a Recovering Drama Queen. I got tired of the same old lines.

Sunday, December 30, 2012

That Child

I screamed at her.
It was the middle of the night
And I was so tired.
Her face was not recognizable,
It was blurred by my imagination.
I recognized the yellow blinds...
They were from my childhood bedroom,
But the room was not mine.
It was isolated from the rest of the house.
I yelled, "I can't do this anymore!"
"This is your child!"
"I can't be the parent!"
The father agreed but offered no assistance.
He was silent,
A faint shadow in the background.
She tried to reassure me,
"I'll take care of this now."
But she disappeared after she spoke.
I wanted to walk away,
I couldn't.
Nothing was going to change,
And the child still needed me.

I woke up and cried for that child.


  1. We all cry for this child. Take care, and I hope 2013 has nothing but good things in store for you.

  2. It was one messed up dream and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.

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  4. I hope this coming year is WONDERFUL for you!!

  5. I'm sad, too. I'm sad for you and for me.


  6. Not that you asked, but hell that's never stopped me before. :) Miss Steph, when things got tough for me a while back, I remember thinking I just wanted a hiatus from everything... I wanted no responsibility, just as my ex-husband had done. And when I was hurting the most, and needing a safe place to land, there were always these two kids pulling at my every limb wanting stuff... TV, to play... to eat (of all things). That was what they knew... I was their mamma and they were only 3 and 4 ish, they knew no better.

    And at that moment, the last thing I wanted to be was a mother. But alas, I had to put my big girl (granny ones, since no one was seeing them anyways) undies on and take care of the responsibilities I had, and loved. Which in the end, was exactly the distraction I needed.

    I have no idea what your dream means, but maybe you're just overwhelmed and need sometime to take care of YOU.


    1. Juli, you may be onto something with your interpretation...I think having my mom here and talking about that house we lived in brought back memories of what a good time that was in my life...add to that my recent break-up and my mom going back to New Mexico and well there you go.