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I'm a Recovering Drama Queen. I got tired of the same old lines.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Open Mic

My ex used to roll over and whack his manhood on the side of my thigh to let me know he was "in the mood for lovin".
So I tried whacking him in the head with a can of polish and a rag to let him know I was "in the mood for a clean car"
Wax on, Whack off!
Right?
*
*
He also used to tell me I had no sex drive.
I drive perfectly,
I just didn't want to when he was in my car.

Posted by Stephanie D at 10:35 AM

11 comments:

  1. Tony Van HelsingWed Apr 18, 10:47:00 AM

    He sounds romantic.

    ReplyDelete
  2. TracyWed Apr 18, 10:56:00 AM

    Bah-dun-dun...

    You really have a talent at stand up. Looks like your Rudy is rubbing off on you in more ways that one...DOH!

    ReplyDelete
  3. fishduckyWed Apr 18, 11:42:00 AM

    "Wax on, Whack off"--was your ex the Karate Kid?

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousWed Apr 18, 12:08:00 PM

    That's whacky.
    Or is it whackluster?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Janie JunebugWed Apr 18, 12:08:00 PM

    Dr. X would lie behind me when I was on my side and try to stick it where it didn't belong. Fortunately, he was so tiny he never got a hole in one. Love your post.

    Janie

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousWed Apr 18, 01:13:00 PM

    Sounds like a whack job to me!

    ReplyDelete
  7. SlamdunkWed Apr 18, 09:16:00 PM

    Oh gosh, who could top Janie's comment. I'll just laugh then.

    ReplyDelete
  8. JuliThu Apr 19, 05:26:00 AM

    Wait.... I think we were married to the same guy.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Not So Simply SingleThu Apr 19, 01:13:00 PM

    Hilarious....

    ReplyDelete
  10. NelsonSun Apr 22, 04:55:00 PM

    Hello Stephanie! My first visit, will visit you again. Seriously, I thoroughly enjoyed your posts( really interesting blog). Would be great if you could visit also mine...Thanks for sharing! Keep up the fantastic work!

    ReplyDelete

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